NYT: John Paul Brammer Is Obsessed With Kate Bush

Jimi Celeste/Patrick McMullan, via Getty Images

22 June 2021 ∙ Originally published in The New York Times

The writer John Paul Brammer was half-jokingly worried about seeming like a “capitalist pig” when sharing his favorite things, as he had originally just listed products.

It’s fitting, though, that a writer whose work is best known through online media has now taken a turn toward material objects. His first book, “¡Hola Papi!: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons,” based on his popular Substack advice column, was released on June 8 and is already scheduled for a second printing.

Much like his hyperactive Twitter account, the essay collection features improbably humorous observations on such personal obsessions as Grindr, middle school trauma and his abuela’s ghost. The book’s title, for example, is a cheeky reclamation of the fetishization he says he constantly encounters as a queer Latino on dating apps.

On a video call, Brammer mentioned an appropriately eclectic list of 10 things getting him through the end of the pandemic. These are edited excerpts from the conversation.

Tecovas Cowboy Boots

Being from Oklahoma, you kind of need a pair of cowboy boots. Tecovas have this stylish sensibility about them, they’re a bit minimal, more streamlined, more friendly to casual everyday wear. I don’t break them out in the summer, though — I would be sweating up a storm. But I love having my cowboy boots out and about; they remind me of home, which is important to me here in Brooklyn, because I still feel like I don’t belong in New York.

“Hounds of Love” by Kate Bush

Before the pandemic, I could only write in coffee shops, so there was a long stretch of time where I couldn’t write anything. I finally thought to start playing albums on my little speaker and, for one reason or another, “Hounds of Love” did it for me. It’s such a weird, ambient project that starts out with bops, then becomes about this woman drowning and being a witch who might be from the future? It’s such an operatic fantasia, and the big burst of color I needed to get my creativity and productivity back.

What she does with language is really interesting, because some of the songs just don’t make a whole lot of sense, which I respect.

Higonokami Folding Knife

Any time I get something that I have to snip or cut off, this is, like, my blade. I also need something to tinker with in my hands or I start to get really anxious. I’ll usually have my knife sitting next to me at the computer so that when I’m on a Zoom call, I can just be folding it in and out. I guess it’s kind of scary knowing that everyone I’ve ever been on Zoom with doesn’t know that I’m playing with a knife just offscreen.

MODMANDY FIT on YouTube

I have really bad body dysmorphia, and the pandemic put me in a terrifying spot because I used to love going to the gym. Even if it wasn’t radically altering my body, it made me feel like I was doing something, and I also need either a class setting, or someone telling me what to do, because I’m incredibly pain-averse. I don’t know what it is about Mandy’s energy, but you can get through these in 10 minutes and feel amazing afterward, so I got hooked. Her tone of voice is so reassuring; I’ve taken a few Barry’s Bootcamp classes and I don’t get that there. It’ll be some white twink screaming at me while Carly Rae Jepsen plays and they’re calling me things like “floor,” or “tread.” The way that Barry’s names you based on where you’re standing, like, “OK, floor, pick it up!”—don’t call me “floor,” I pay too much for this.

Lao Gan Ma Chili Sauce

This has a super pleasant, numbing, tingly effect on the tongue, and I find that when I add it to something, it elevates the whole dish. It makes me feel very competent and capable in the kitchen, which, you know, is important. The woman who originally made Lao Gan Ma is on the jar, staring disapprovingly at you, and that’s really important to me as well. I don’t say anything to her while I’m cooking, it’s mostly just, “What am I doing in this kitchen?” She would not approve of my dishes.

The “Hung Up” Substack by Hunter Harris

Hunter has a specific voice that’s always entertaining. I don’t know much about “Bennifer,” I don’t know about Martin Scorsese, but it’s not even about them at this point. She has a way of turning those things into a personal vocabulary, so I’m more in it to see how she writes than I am about the things themselves. I also find the things she gloms onto really interesting; her becoming obsessed with J. Lo’s nude lip is so funny to me. She’s a good reminder for me, as a writer, that it’s not really what you’re talking about, but how you talk about it.

Journaling

The second I was able to afford it, I got a nice leather-bound journal, and I have found that having a fancy one makes me take it more seriously. My journaling is much more stream-of-consciousness than my other writing, but I’ve found that, in not thinking too hard about it, I stumble upon language tricks I can use in my other writing. It’s important to make writing seem like less of a chore and more an ongoing thing, like a good conversation you have every day.

Breakfast Leipzig Candle from D.S. & Durga

I am so afraid to light this candle because it was so expensive. I’ve had it for several months now and I can’t quite bring myself to light it. It has an illustration on the front of a table with a coffee cup and, for some reason or another, I can picture myself at that table in Leipzig eating an almond croissant — which is part of the smell profile, by the way — and I know exactly what time of day it is. It’s early morning where light is creeping in through the window, and I’m in one of those hotel rooms, with the big, velvety draped curtains and the big arched windows and it’s all so pleasant. I’m afraid to lose it because I only have so many D.S. & Durga candles in my bank account.

Rewatching “Portrait of a Lady on Fire”

I don’t know what it is about my brain, but the idea of starting a movie always feels so monumental to me. “Portrait of a Lady on Fire” is special to me, though, because it packs so much power into every single “oui.” Every time someone in that movie says “oui,” it blows me away. I love that a painter is involved, and that there’s something really gay afoot. Austere white ladies doing things puts my brain at peace.

CAVA Spicy Hummus

Like with Lao Gan Ma, adding it to a basic cooked salmon makes me feel like a chef. It’s really sad, honestly, how I will ride to Whole Foods, get four of them at a time, and stack them up in my fridge. It’s not something I do because I want to anymore; it’s more a thing I have to have. I haven’t mixed it with Lao Gan Ma, though. That sounds terrifying: two powerhouses under one roof.